Baby Beware

So today B and I headed over to a playdate with some of her little friends. I use the word "playdate" loosely because 4 and 5 month olds don't interact much. They stare at one another and gnaw on their hands, while us mommies cling to our group and our last remaining shred of sanity. This is the time where we learn that what we are reading in baby books is BS. "Oh, your baby isn't taking two naps at 9am and 1pm either? Good! Neither is mine!" And "Thank god my child is not the only one that refuses to sleep anywhere but her car seat." And, "No, we are not making our own organic baby food. Store-bought organic is just as good!" (And yes, we are working moms, so no, we are not going to feel bad about not having time to make organic baby food at home. )Trust me, if I had that kind of time I would be shaving my legs while in the shower. Who thought time management would consist of "Do I shave my legs today or wash my hair?" And that is on a good day when I can actually take a shower!

Moving on - I am admittedly guilty of the "I will never..." phrases in my pre-baby life. I will never let my child sleep on me. B had other plans, and when baby girl needs to sleep and I have tried EVERYTHING under the sun, sometimes I just have to sit there and let her sleep on me so her tiny self can recharge. And who will forget "I will never bring my child into bed." Guess what, folks? When it is 4 am and your little one has been waking up every hour, on the hour, screaming, your sleep deprived self realizes that 2 hours of light sleep with your baby in bed, is better than stumbling into the bathroom and almost peeing without pulling your pants down, and yes, I almost did this once. And so, this brings me to my new question - what will happen to my "I will never..." phrases related to toddlers?

 Here is what happened today. A mommy whom I don't know very well brought her 5 month old daughter today, along with her 4 year old son. Her son was, of course, fascinated with B. Of all the adorable little babies there today, this little boy was drawn to B as cats to tuna. He just had to get in her face, and touch her little hands, and rub her little belly. The germaphobe in me began to hear warning bells go off, and I began to  cautiously eye my diaper bag containing my little bottle of sanitizer. Meanwhile, this boy's mommy is sitting there saying "Be careful." And I'm thinking "Be careful?! Keep your grubby little hands to your self!" (Momma Bear syndrome) I have heard from many people that parents are more lax once they have a second child, but don't they remember the days of being a new parent and wanting to keep your child in a germ-free bubble?!! And so I reached the delicate line of do I correct the child in front of the mother, or try to distract him? Then he asks if he can hold B. Really??!! And his mom says, "Where do we have to hold babies?" And he hangs his head and dejectedly replies "On the couch." We are on the floor, so I happily think, yes! Saved by the mommy rules - but not, so! His mother then says "So go find a spot on the couch."

Luckily (yet unluckily) he is immediately distracted by B flinging her hands into the air and he swiftly grabs her little hand, to which I cannot stop from yelping "Easy!" and he proceeds to stick her hand in his mouth to kiss or suck, I'm not really sure because before I know it, I'm whisking B into the air saying she needs her diaper changed, all the while keeping said hand away from her hungry little mouth. (Have I mentioned that B sticks her hands in her mouth constantly?) I then artfully position myself, B and the diaper bag behind a chair where I proceed to use half a box of baby wipes on B's hand and arm before changing her dry diaper. Who lets their child stick a baby's hand in their mouth? He has his own little sister whose hand he can eat anytime. And surely, the "I will never..." phrase welled up inside of me. I will never let B go around eating people's baby's hands.  I will never let B put her hands all over little babies because I will remember those days. I know that children are curious about babies, I understand. Babies are very cute, and they are tinier than toddlers which is very appealing since toddlers are little people themselves.

  Later the afternoon when B was safely attached to my boob, this little boy was playing with his baby sister, and happily shoving her little fingers into his mouth. Suddenly the little baby cried out, and the mother yelled at her son "What did you do?" His response?  .........  "I bit her finger." And while this short conversation was going on between mother and son, the poor baby was so worked up with a silent scream that she wasn't taking a breath - that awful, purple look. The mother freaked out, scooped up the wailing infant and dragged the boy into the other room. Not before us other moms noticed the bite mark on the baby's finger. And all I could think? Thank goodness it wasn't B. Today would not have been a good day for Momma Bear to come out. (aka, me losing my cool over B, which isn't pretty or good for keeping mommy friends) Ahh, parenthood.  Here's to hoping...."I will never let my child bite a baby."